Category: Motivation

One of my clients shared an analogy with me recently that was most insightful: “We all carry around an invisible backpack. Inside it are all the things we experienced and haven’t let go. Some of those are nice memories. Others simply burden us down.”

Those many images are clear to me.

Growing up in Fort Worth with terrific friends. Winning the boys basketball state championship as seniors. All the people I met in sports television. These bring smiles.

Not buying Berkshire Hathaway Class A shares at $1,000. Calling a friend’s mom the name of their dog – at least 10 times – one afternoon. Failing to forgive someone for too many years. These bring regret.

Perhaps a better approach might be to let the past go and focus on this moment… on what needs to be taken care of today. At least then all those things taking up space in my backpack – and cluttering my mind – would dissipate… and I might be able to recall more important things, like the reason I walked into a room or what I am supposed to pick up at the grocery store. 

When I was a kid, my mom gave me a book by NBA All-Star Jerry Lucas, who was something of a memory savant. He could walk into a room to give a speech and in less than a couple of minutes repeat the names of 50 people in the audience. I recall learning the U.S. capital cities by creating picture connections… such as ‘Della dove in her swimwear’ for Dover, Delaware.

A couple years ago, I read ‘Moonwalking With Einstein,’ by a journalist who used ‘memory palaces’ to win an international competition. Picture every room in the house you grew up in. When you need to remember a list, place the items in a room. For instance: front door: apples; entry hall: bread; living room: milk; kitchen: laundry detergent. I use this one often… and have several ‘palaces’ such as buildings on my college campus and offices at my first job.

When it comes to retaining number sequences, such as ridiculously long codes our bank texts me for two-factor authentication, I use NFL players numbers. So… Brett Favre is 4; John Elway, 7; Roger Staubach, 12; Johnny Unitas, 19, etc. 

Which brings us today: Russell Wilson, Don Hutson, Bart Starr, Justin Tucker, Rod Woodson, Bob Breunig, Jack Lambert, Bryant Young, John Randle, Devin Hester, Troy Aikman, Todd Christensen

Otherwise known as the first 20 digits of pi.

Note: Jerry Lucas was Phi Beta Kappa at Ohio State. He’s a member of the Basketball Hall of Fame and one of the ’50 Greatest Players in NBA History’ (1996). ‘Doctor Memory’ turns 82 in two weeks and has authored more than 70 books. 

In August 2018, I wrote about our son Kyle being transferred to Nashville for a new role after one year working in Houston:

I’ll miss the young man I called ‘Little Buddy’ as a boy and now refer to as ‘Bud.’ I’ll miss my golf partner. I’ll miss the Sunday dinners at our house. I’ll miss having him help with ‘just a few small things’ whenever he visits. I’ll miss seeing his great smile. Yet, I know this is the way it’s supposed to be. We raise our kids to find their own paths and add value to the world.

While these three-and-a-half years didn’t pass ‘quickly’ – perhaps a global pandemic disrupted the space-time continuum – Kyle had a successful run in Music City… and ExxonMobil moved him back to HQ this month.

He’s adapting to the new position during a time of uncertainty in the energy industry and political turmoil around the world. He’s living with us for a while until the house he’s building is completed. We joined a golf-only club a few minutes from his new home.

Whatever the future holds, personally and professionally, I believe ‘Kyle with the Smile’ will be just fine… and I feel the same way about his generation. They experienced more disruptive events in the first 27+ years of life than mine did in our first 40.

When I was a kid, ‘far out’ was a standard, Sixties-era, hippie-inspired expression. Fast forward five decades and you’ll hear ‘far left’ and ‘far right’ and not much ‘far out.’

Whatever hot topic of the news cycle – taxation, abortion, masks, vaccination, climate change, gun control, childcare, and many others – most of the non-stop rhetoric comes from those on the far ends of the political spectrum. Meanwhile, the rest of us are just living our lives.

If non-stop noise from The Extremes ignites stress and frustration in your life, consider tuning it out and focusing on what you can control. A good place to start might be with contemplating the message sent long ago from the ‘far up’: Love your neighbor as yourself.