Forward Motion

Over the last year I worked to develop a relationship with a large company in the transportation industry. This included starting over midway through when the person who oversees their coaching practice left the organization. Several months after that setback I had a terrific conversation with the new director. Finally, on her recommendation, I interviewed with two HR specialists to become part of their stable of coaches. I waited patiently as two weeks passed without hearing a word. Then I received an email informing me they selected someone else.

As the disappointment set in that I wouldn’t be coaching their senior leaders, I felt the dejection of rejection. It’s not a feeling I enjoy, and it’s one reason being a salesperson will never be in my career plans. I moped around for about an hour, went outside for some fresh air and about every 30 minutes until bedtime kept falling back into wondering what went wrong.

The next morning I woke up refreshed and with a new attitude. While I could have sat around feeling sorry for myself – ‘How could they not choose me?’ – that would have only wasted time. It wouldn’t have changed anything.

Then wisdom arrived: This was not about me being qualified or talented enough to coach their leaders; it was about the decision-maker selecting what is best – from her perspective – for their organization. My role in the process was to be authentic. I did my part. She did hers. This time there wasn’t alignment. Tomorrow will be another opportunity with another organization. I’m ready.

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Return to Yesteryear

A couple of Sundays ago we scheduled an ‘electronics free day’ at our house – which our kids met with a resounding “What! You’re kidding?” From the time we awakened until we went to bed, there was no television or radio… no e-mail or Twitter …no cell phones or iPods…no Xbox or Nintendo DS.

Instead, my wife, kids (ages 19, 15 and 11) and I did things like…oh…have focused conversations, read books and play board games. We also cleaned our house from top to bottom, discovering three overflowing bags of clothes and toys to donate to charity. From my viewpoint, it seemed all of us were more relaxed, smiled a lot and went to bed exhausted. The next morning, the kids even said, “You know, that wasn’t so bad.”

Obviously, it’s hard these days to disconnect for an extended period of time – and there were a couple of moments I admit to fighting the urge to peak at the Internet to see what was happening in the world. The bottom line is we enjoyed each others’ presence a lot, and the day turned out better than any of us expected. Then there’s the thought we used less energy, which is good for several reasons. It’s our intention to do this throwback day again in December when our daughter returns from college…and I, for one, can’t wait.

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